I was researching some purchases I needed to make for work. It was late and I was ready to finish up and go to sleep. My wife came in to get ready for bed. She saw the laptop and joked, “Looking at hot guys jerking off again?” “No, that’s your job. I could get it set up again if you want. I just need to copy the model number off this laser printer first.”“So sexy,” she laughed and went into the bathroom. While she was there I copied the the model number into an email, sent it, and launched the dirty roulette site. She came out of the bathroom, checked her phone, and got into bed. I turned the laptop screen towards her. “Oh my god,” she laughed, “put that away.” I hit START and pushed the keyboard toward her. She sighed and shook her head but she looked at the screen. “Ew, no. Next.” She slowly got drawn into the project of finding a suitable partner. She paused a few times but nothing was grabbing her. I started to get bored and looked at my phone. Then I heard a male voice: “hello?”. After more than an hour of meticulously scrubbing down every inch of every surface and corner, I stepped back to marvel at my accomplishment. In addition to killing bad guys and doing a lot of other things, the Marine Corps really taught me how to clean up and keep things clean. I wondered whether my brother would perceive the transformation.The next item on my action plan for the day was to get groceries. I refused to eat another slice of greasy pizza and drink beer, plus it wasn’t healthy, especially not for Susie. On my way from the bus terminal, the taxi passed a grocery store about four or five blocks down the street. That was my next target of operation.“Good morning, Harriet,” I greeted the neighbor. “Do you need anything from the grocery store? I’m going there right now.”She was happy to see me and thanked me for the offer. However, she warned me to make sure that they double bagged the heavy stuff.I hadn’t been in a civilian grocery store for years and this one looked like.
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