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Fuck you.” “Let’s see. You started with Tony. He was a linebacker and dumb as hell. I’m kind of amazed he could even string together two words to ask you out.” In his best caveman imitation, Mark said. “Ma... Ma... Mackenzie... da... da... date... Toe...Toe... Tony tonight.” “You’re an asshole.” “How could you date that idiot?” “He’s really cute and has an amazing smile. Have you seen his Abs? You always say I’m superficial. He was all looks and no substance.” Ignoring me Mark continued, “Then you moved on to Mason. I don’t know if you moved up or down on the dating scale with Mason. The guy’s fucking huge. A defensive end, well, he was the entire defensive line. I mean people had to clear the hallway when he walked by. What did you ever see in him?” “He’s really sweet,” I said in my best ‘awwwww shucks, he’s cute and I’m fawning’ voice. Quickly returning to my normal voice, “Yeah, he’s not huge everywhere.” “Oh, no, no, that’s gross,” Mark protested. “No, seriously. His balls were. In any case she would hardly want to start again with me in the state I was in. I didn't want her to see me and then for me to know that she was revolted by me. I needed to find out more before approaching her. But how? More immediately I would have to tell Trish.That evening after the evening meal that I had prepared, I sat her down on the sofa and prepared myself. She looked intrigued."Something happened?" she asked with a nervous smile."Before I start, will you promise to do nothing about what I'm going to tell you?" I asked earnestly.She looked startled, then a smile spread across her face."You've remembered!" she said triumphantly."Will you promise?" It's big, isn't it?" her smile was broader."Trish, for the last time, or I won't tell you. Promise?"She looked contrite."Yes, Aled," she said, and waited."It's not Aled," I said with a straight face.She actually squealed, something I'd never heard her do before, I least I didn't think so. "You've remembered! Well?" It's Allan.
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