We always left feeling hungry. That wasto keep us slim, part of the overall emphasis on making us pretty and, asI realised later, coquettish. Not long before this story ends they had towear really skimpy french maid outfits. The kind where any bending overto serve food or clear a table would reveal a band of white skin abovethe net stockings and further up frilly white french knickers with blacklace trim.Under the blouse we each wore a bra, which is another story. At firsteverybody was flat chested. The bras we wore were just thin cottontriangles. I?ve seen them on little girls in the kids section of fashionmagazines. After about three weeks my nipples became very sensitive, andthere was a noticeable swelling where my breasts were growing. The otherswere the same and we all had to change to using soft fluffy cottontraining bras. After about two months our breasts were fully developedand we were able to start wearing conventional bras with shoulder andback straps. These were not. “If I do not leave then I will fall madly in love with you. If I fall in love with you, I would have to have you here with me always, and you could never have sex with anyone but me.” I already knew that I did not want sex with anyone but her. I already knew that I was in love. Her trying to make it easy for us to part just made me love her and want her more. She leaned forward to kiss me, climbed off the bed and ran into the bathroom. With her kiss I felt the wet traces of tears from her face. I bit hard on my lip. The metallic taste of blood filled my mouth. It did not matter; I could not let Anna hear the sobs bursting from deep in my soul. By the time Anna emerged and started to dress, I knew that I had to leave. I was no longer sure if I had a marriage, but I did know that I had three children and a father that meant the world to me and, for a few more years at least, needed me back in California . “I am sorry,” I said softly. Anna walked over to the bed and wrapped me in her.
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