Hidden thoughts awaken, thoughts long forgotten now have born a new. Thoughts that speak the words, ‘We were here before.’ or it seems as though we were. We can’t remember when or how, maybe racial memory, (if one can believe in such a thing) but it seems sure that this is part of who we were, or at least were once. Lying buried in the earth, buried in our minds in places never visited, yet places we have been before. Things long buried awaken again, things from the past calling down the ages to the ears of the present. This ancient thing of metal, older than anything made by our hand, this ancient thing of manufacture, beyond our current ability yet to make, and yet it bears our mark, our hands have touched this before. There is a doorway in its surface, a hatch there to be opened and though we have to be able to bring forth the courage to do this simple thing. Can it be that in the opening of this simple doorway, that we are afraid it will open more doors within ourselves? It is. Putting that all together, I deduce that you became pregnant as an undergraduate. I do not presume to guess whether that was before or after you married Prof. Stuart. I do surmise that you completed your undergraduate degree and then worked to support your husband through his graduate program. If you do have a graduate degree, you earned it after your husband completed his PhD while still working and raising your daughter. I don't know whether you have any other children but I am guessing not. Since you warned me to stay away from your daughter, I presume that you are very protective, possibly in hopes that she will avoid mistakes that you feel you made."I paused to take a sip of my coffee and continued, "You have sacrificed almost everything for your husband and daughter. I am guessing that they are a much higher priority to you than you are to them. I suspect that their indifference to your feelings saddens you. And that is why I asked you, when will you get your reward. So tell me.
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