Eventually she calmed down and started telling Liz what happened. It took nearly twenty minutes for her to tell Liz, what with all the interruptions to cry again, and her t-shirt was soaked by the time Tess had finished."So, you see why everything is wrecked. There's no way that I can ever have anything to do with Josh again. I've betrayed him so badly."Liz was close to losing control of herself. She pretty much agreed with Tess, and she was disgusted with Tess. But when Tess said "I guess you hate me too now", she had to stop and think about the forgiveness that Jesus had shown to her and everyone else."Tess, Jesus can forgive you, and I can forgive you too."Tess looked at her in surprise. "You're kidding? I'm sitting here thinking that if Jesus was real, he would've hit me with a bolt of lightning and finished me off after what I did." No way, if he hit you with anything it would be a bolt of love. Why would you think that?" Because that's what Mum always says will happen because I. But then she felt the yearning rising in her soft belly for the actual pressure of another body to her body, someone-else’s hand to explore her sex (shyly she wriggled and blushed). She thought how no man seemed interested and became sad. She lost the wish to pleasure herself in the longing for someone-else to share pleasure. Now she was not even in the mood for her favourite fantasy: the one in which she pictured two lean and hard-muscled young men enjoying each other’s bodies — one of them in military uniform! This totally inappropriate scenario could make her so excited it had surprisingly satisfying results. Her brain started fretting about the housekeeping. ‘Flour is so expensive, the accounts are out of balance. Clair must ask van Sietter for more money. Again! Such folly. van H’las is seeking an agreement that will free up trade and make wheat cheaper. If wheat is cheaper, surely the housekeeping budget will balance. If I am fretting over the price of wheat, what must the.
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