.. SYSTEMS LAWS & RULESIf Architects built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.Any Given program, once running, is obsolete.If a test program functions perfectly, all subsequent systems will malfunctionIf a program is useful, it will have to be changed corollary:If a program is useless, it will have to be documented.All programs expand to fill available memory corollary:All programs expand beyond the ability of the programmer to understand them.Interchangeable files won’tRegardless of the units used by the customer, the programmer shall use his own arbitrary units, convertible only by means of weird & unnatural conversion factors. Speed, for example, will be expressed as furlongs per fortnight.Files that cannot be destroyed will be.Investment in reliability will increase until it exceeds the cost of errors, or until someone insists that work be done.A carelessly planned program takes 4 times longer to complete. Don't touch anybody else's belonging. Don't go into their locker. Under no circumstances. Not even if they ask you and don't ask anyone to touch your belonging. Let there be no misunderstandings — there will be no misunderstandings about touching another's property — don't! - not even your laundry, you put it in the bags yourself and the duty student handles the bag only.Your things of value go into the small locker in your stowage.Let's go eat (evil laugh) or look at it." How did things go?" Clare asked Cedric who was the OW"All reports green; they should be finishing up in the messes shortly." I'll be in my cabin — or wherever — for eight o'clock reports. Com if you need me." Aye, aye Ma'am. Captain leaving the bridge."At four morning, the tannoys erupted with the trumpet blast of the wake up and stand to call. Startled students, screamed, yelled, or pulled the pillow over their head as the full glare of daytime lighting burned its way into semi stuperose minds. The LHs, already in.
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