And deeply ashamed.As if that weren't enough, she couldn't even escape into her Goth lover's arms for a moment's relief. Erika's grandmother had passed away during the weekend, and the teen had been whisked off to Kentucky for the funeral ... leaving Barbara trapped with this terrifying hunger that, at times, seemed poised to consume her.And inevitably, she began to wonder if sharing sexual love with her daughter would truly be such a terrible thing.Is it really so wrong? she thought, struggling to make sense of her feelings. We love each other. Wouldn't this simply be taking our love to a new level ... giving our relationship a kind of intimacy that most mothers and daughters don't get to share?Barbara was still determined not to give in to these forbidden cravings for Becky ... but she also wondered if her resolve was beginning to falter a bit.And now on this lovely July afternoon, as she sat at the kitchen table, the sight of her child in summery clothing was making Barbara feel. " I admitted."You pay whores for sex?" she said."Yes, but separately, the escorts are just for the social events," I explained, "Well educated well spoken beauties and I treat them as if I were a gentleman, and then for sex." For sex?" she said."Well well spoken and intelligent are hardly criteria." I explained, "I just want to pay my fifty pounds and not have someone turn up nine months pregnant in due course." She turned round to face me and sat on the edge of her desk."I see," she said, "Why are you telling me this?" You're a good listener?" I suggested, "Captive audience." But, it's disgusting!" she suggested."I wanted to explain." I continued, "I thought you wanted a relationship, no an entrapment, get pregnant, like Francine did to Dad, do you see?" Oh," she exclaimed, "I see, no, that wasn't it, not babies, just money." Never mind, crossed wires, shall I give you a hand with this to your car?" I suggested."I'd better leave it, it's company property." she said sadly, "Get a.
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