I understand that you must be pretty nervous, being on national TV and we're the hottest quiz show on the telly at the moment, so we'll just call you 'D.P.' then...is that OK ?" " And over to you, Miss Ratcatcher-Bucket...welcome to the show, Ophelia. My oh my, young lady that's quits a set of bazookas you're sporting there and might I add that you're looking particularly repulsive this evening. The warts are a nice touch, did you do them yourself or do they run in the family ? Tell the audience a bit about yourself" I'm a welder and I collect stamps and car registration numbers in my spare time, Kat. The warts were in the box I grew up in. Dad must have left them in there for me so they must be hereditary and I wear them all the time. Oh, and btw, D.P. can't talk. Hasn't got a tongue, you see. My sister said that her dad sold it to a Chinese restaurant in Scunthorpe when he was 4 years old, which is a bummer because I'm a Cunning Linguist but otherwise we do still have fun down at. About 2 weeks passed, and we kept our usual distance. My mom workedalot. I just kept to myself. Than my stepfather called me into the livingroom. He told me there, with my mom, that he planned for us to go huntingdown in North Carolina, a few hours away. I told him I didnt likehunting, that I never had. My mom than speaks up and says that getting outof the house, just the 2 of us would be for the best, that I needed tostart acting a little more like a son, and adleast try to spend sometime with my step dad. There was no further discussion. The following day he got me up early and I helped load up the car.We left and drove a long ways with out a lot of conversation. Finally hespoke up. He said somthing like" Its probably partly my fault that you actthe way you do, wasting your time, fucking up in school. I should have started tanning your ass when I first moved in. You need some direction,some guidence, and you need to be whipped into shape, in every since ofthe word..
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