I waited for her to stop clenching before slowly rocking back. As I slid forward there was less resistance but I still had to be slow as not to hurt her. I slid back again then slid forward. Each time with less resistance.I start to develop a decent pace and she no longer is whimpering. From what I can tell I believe she is starting to enjoy it. As I enjoy the feeling of being inside her, and not just the physical feeling but the act in its self is enjoyable on a mental level. I start to run my nails across her back. Not enough to break skin but enough to leave red marks. I run my hands across her back and down her ass towards her thighs.*SMACK*I brought my hand down across her ass as I pulled back. I scratched from where my hand had fallen to her back then came down with my other hand.*SMACK*I was starting to really enjoy myself and letting the animal instinct take over. I was riding her ass as if she was my horse and my hands were riding crops coming down on her hindquarters. It’s like this person beside me isn’t Ben. I want to tear my hair out just to make that Ben come back and occupy this skin beside me that’s not looking at me. ‘I guess we’re not okay yet.’ The words are dragged out of me. ‘Guess not,’ he agrees. ‘God damnit, Ben,’ I punch the air with my words and stomp away, leaving my coffee there, leaving Amy there. And I walk. I walk a long time. My knees aren’t very happy with me, and then my feet are even less happy. The only thing I can think about is that I have no idea how to live my life without Ben. It starts to rain. And here I forgot my umbrella. The streets puddle with light as the sun sets. I feel the rain flow between my fingers as I walk. I can’t remember being this drenched before. It’s when I get to a corner store and see the flowers there, the tulips that I realize I’ve been crying. My throat hurts so bad with trying to hold it in that I can’t swallow. I reach for my phone and text him because I don’t know what else to do. All I.
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