‘‘Just say it, I need you to say it.’’Goldberg stood up from his chair, casting his dark shadow over me.‘‘GIVE ME YOUR SOUL!’’I felt total emptiness inside. As if I was already lost to the world. How could I even be considering this? Siara was my best friend and sure, I loved her. I even felt responsible for her death, seeing how I hadn’t acted fast enough to prevent it. But still, selling my soul in exchange for her immortal one… was any friendship worth that?Truth was, I did this for myself. Partially because of my longstanding self-hatred and the conviction that I had to be punished. Since for years I had been telling myself that I would never be enough. That my father had abandoned me for a reason, and that I was an abomination for the urges I kept having. Even though I acted tough around my friends about my sexual escapades, underneath all that false confidence was plenty of guilt. Which was also the reason I had been longing to self-destruct. Not just by small acts, but by. And when you left in a hurry he didn’t want TJ to think he’d run you off. So I’ve been house sitting and doing a little to earn my keep.’ ‘Oh?’ ‘Well I was between places so it worked out,’ she said a bit nervously. ‘See what you think.’ She turned back into the new bathroom and we followed. ‘WOW!’ I exclaimed. ‘This is gorgeous!’ Regan added. ‘Well it’s not quite finished yet, but it’s close. Is it anything like you’d expected?’ ‘Not even close.’ She looked a bit worried, ‘It’s better than I could have ever done.’ She grinned at that. I had envisioned just getting a bathroom in, a decent tile on the floor and something else on the wall, figure out a placement for the sinks and stools and mirrors and… Let me see if I can do justice to what I saw. A dark slate floor of twelve by twenty four inch tiles. A high gloss black ceramic tall baseboard with three by nine subway tiles above that. A stool behind a divider in each corner of the long wall with a long counter with two under counter.
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