I had to stop you from killing the board because then they couldn’t make their movie about me and my widow couldn’t exploit my artistic legacy for millions,’ Kurt explained. ‘But Kurt, these rich, tasteless movie executives are exactly the kind of people you wrote songs against,’ I pointed out. ‘Yeah, once my widow gets paid, I have kind of a mind to take them out myself. Or maybe I could just steal their luxury cars. That would be more fun,’ said Kurt. ‘What’s your super-power?,’ I asked. ‘Here let me show you. I can put ten fatal doses of heroin in my body and then blow your brains out with my shotgun,’ Kurt said nonchalantly. Fortunately for me, a beautiful blonde college intern was walking through the hall at that moment. I grabbed her and held a gun to her head. ‘I’ll kill her if you don’t give me your shotgun,’ I shouted. ‘Oh, that’s okay. Go ahead and kill her. I’ll be done shooting up in just a minute and then I can get to you,’ Kurt mumbled, still pumping heroin into his. I went back to the kitchen and my mother told me to run to the store to get some lemons for the salad dressing. I went quickly, because I knew Cindy would be in the questioning room all the time I was out, especially knowing how shrewd my mom is. My mom made a face when she saw me get back so soon. Over lunch, my mother casually asked,“So you kids had a good night?” “Yeah,” I said. “Not really,” said Cindy. “How’s that?” my mother asked puzzled. “Well, neither of us could fall asleep. I was in a strange bed, and Cindy was excited because I was there. So we had some bananas and milk, and we both went to sleep right away, until her mother called at six this morning to see if Cindy was still alive.” They both laughed. After lunch we showed my mother a couple of the new steps we had “practiced” and then we said goodbye and went back to Cindy’s. On the way home, she told me my mother had asked her if I had made a pass at her, and she had said that I was a gentleman, and she’d marry me if.
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