'I'd better make sure not to get this thing wet, ' Béla thought, 'it might decide I'm a piece of plankton. A big piece!'She really wasn't worried about this thing trying to digest her. It didn't have the capacity. She felt silly about having been afraid of it. It was just a large piece of fungus, after all."Who decided to make clothes out of this stuff, anyway?" she asked Jeff."It came with the manor," Jeff told her. "The last owner had an odd collection of unusual items, including this living gown. One of your ladies-in-waiting suggested it when I asked her about what we should wear to this festival. She has no idea who made it. There are very few of them around, I understand. I get the idea that these things are priceless."The goddess sighed. Her garment sighed with her. It seemed happy to be wrapped around her. She had been too afraid of it to notice its sensuality before, but she was beginning to notice it, now. She held out her hand for her consort to escort her to the grand. Singleton, my tyrannical math teacher, when my door burst open. I smelled the fumes long before she reached me. ‘What the fuck do you think you’re doing, Rick!’ she bellowed drunkenly, covering me in fumes strong enough to ignite. ‘Uh, doing my homework,’ I said, cowering away from her, much to my shame. My mother isn’t particularly large or imposing, but when she gets drunk she is as strong as an ox and she isn’t afraid to use whatever physical force she deems necessary to subdue her objective, which more often than not, is yours truly, into doing whatever she wants. ‘You burned my fucking dinner, you worthlessh peesh of shit!’ she screeched and hit me with an open handed slap that rocked my head back and made little birdied chirp in my head. ‘I-I’m sorry,’ I stuttered, but she was in no mood to listen. ‘Gonna make you pay for burnin my dinner,’ she kept chanting over and over again. She made a grab for the heavy stone based lamp on my desk. Oh shit, I thought, scrambling to get.
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