You can fight with these men and then what? What will you do after? You have closed the door to the future your father set.”I looked up at him and then grinned, “perhaps I will become a noble?”He laughed and kicked his horse to get it moving. I looked at the men, “what say you noble men of war?”They laughed and then one started a battle song. Perhaps the prince was right that I had killed my future but it was mine and not my father’s or anyone else. When we topped a rise a large army was on the other side of the valley. They were in ranks and the men went silent. I looked at the enemy and the way they stood and how they were armed.I laughed and the men looked at me while the sergeant glared. I smiled, “they do not even have uniforms. Look at their weapons, bronze not steel. Their shields are wood and not steel.”The men laughed and I nodded, “follow and guard my back and I will take you straight to their heart.”They cheered and the sergeant grinned and nodded. We marched down and. Altered me, from being just another home-alone young mumEarly DaysI hum along to Radio Caroline as I wash-up and listen to them playing together behind me.Jess is squealing with delight as Dan romps on the floor with her. The sounds are reminiscent of my own childhood with him.Staring at the darkness through the window I recall how he would play with me in just the same way and I'd adored him.He'd fondle me on his lap, calling me his princess. When older, I'd daydream of those moments, placing him in the role of my boyfriend.That carefree period of innocence had past all to soon; to be replaced with awkwardness.Sat on his lap before bedtime, I had begun a kissing game on his ear.I'll always remember that strange tone of mum saying, 'you should be past that sort of thing my girl!'It induced a sense of shame. A girl has to stop romping around with her Dad at some stage but you lose something growing-up.I smile to myself. Now it's my daughter experiencing those joys!While I stare into.
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