I started to back away but the man spoke first “ah, sorry to barge in on you but it got late and my son was throwing a fit cause he wanted to see you and its our last night here and he said he knew you; Say’s you’re quite the fisherman. I apologize but you know what it’s like trying to console a distraught child.” I was dumbstruck and speechless. The man noticed, continuing slowly “So… does he know you or is he just playing me for the fool and having me bother you for no reason,” adding an uncomfortable chuckle. I gave in and plopped down in my chair and offered him a seat at the picnic table. I grabbed a beer, tossed him one (which he caught even with his son in his arms,) and waited for him to kick my ass. His boy started to rouse, only half awake in his pajamas, but began explaining (for me more than his father) that I met him while he was swimming near to where I was fishing. I was more than willing to play along; his story was better than me being pummeled by his father. . He nodded and added, “Don’t worry about it, though. It looks good on you stretched out and with the chest popping through the collar and all that. Gives a nice preview of your package, too.” Vasily wasn’t sure if he enjoyed hearing another man remark with admiration about his package. He grimaced and continued to shift uneasily like an athlete before a big game. Johnny checked his notes. “So, is it okay if I say you’re from Moscow?” “I am not Russian,” Vasily grunted, “I am from Zaporizhia.” Johnny winced. “Zapo-wha-hah? Sounds like a cough lozenge!” He shook his head. “Look, friend, no one knows where Zapo-whatever or Zippy-dee-doo-da is. No one out there has heard of it and I sure as hell can’t pronounce it.” Vasily grimaced like a fly had landed on his nose. “Let’s just keep it simple, okay?” Johnny coached, “I go out and introduce you from wherever… it doesn’t really matter where, to be honest. They ain’t gonna get on their phones to Google it. You come out, you strip, you grind.
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