One of the first tasks was to transform to sissy Nicole , so a pink latex dress was slipped on , as well as a ponytail mask , stockings and stiletto boots. Then the pleasure and pain started. Pain first. I had to read Mistress a story i had written. I had to read it whilst bent over a storage chest raising my bottom as high as possible into the air. A selection of canes were placed to one side and with a shiver i began the story.I could see Mistress choose a cane as i nervously started reading. "Louder" , she called , as the first stroke landed. A swish followed by a thud and intense pain took my breath away. I upped my volume, but the strokes kept coming. I tried to thank Mistress for my punishment , but that just interrupted the story and led to even more cane strokes. My body was shaking and i was really struggling to hold the position. My bottom was now on fire from the punishment , but i continued to read from the pages in front of me. Mistress would change over to a different. Of his undressing me and putting me in the shower. I recalled the freshly washed clothes that I had arrived in. My loathing for myself reached it’s zenith that afternoon and evening when I arrived at Jakes apartment for the second time, and yet, I could feel portions of my life coming together again. That night in what was to become my bed in the room with Jake I was filled with guilt, remorse, repugnance and loathing for myself. . . .but I felt safe and secure and I slept soundly for the first time in many days. Facing my peers at school was difficult. Most had heard about my situation and kept a wide margin between us. Others were less kind and openly derided me for what I perceived myself to be. It was after days of this that I needed Jake’s quiet counselling and guidance. Jake doesn’t know it but I never tried to find other accommodations and determined to live with him as long as he’d have me. Days turned into weeks and weeks into months. Jake and I co-operated in living.
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