.. actually," Nerdly interrupted, "I thought maybe we could hold off on the Eiffel Tower for a bit." Hold off?" Sharon said. "It's less than half a mile from our hotel. Why would you want to hold off?" I'm a little tired from the traveling," he said."Tired?" Jake asked, raising his eyebrows a little. "It was a two hour flight, Nerdly." And you went to bed at nine o'clock last night," Sharon said with a pout."It's also raining and windy," Nerdly said. "I'd rather wait for better weather."Nerdly was acting decidedly strange but Jake shrugged it off. "Okay," he said. "Is it okay if Helen and I go check it out without you then?" Of course," Nerdly said. "Be our guest." Sure," Sharon said, obviously a little dejected. "Be sure to get pictures." What about you, Matt?" Jake asked the guitar player, who was sipping from a rum and coke he'd made. "What are you doing after we get checked in? Wanna check out the tower with us?" No," he said, shaking his head. "I'm gonna crash out for a couple of. The feelings were confusing. I was amazed that Nick seemed to care what I thought. I hadn’t experienced that before and certainly not when sex was already in play, however I couldn’t shake the memories of my mother’s boyfriends who hadn’t cared what I thought. The memories took hold of me and I began to weep.“Oh god.” Nick said.“Paula?” Meredith called out.“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” I said.Tears flooded out with a surge of memory. I wept because I was confused, not because I was unhappy. A flood of emotions swirled around the pressure I felt to be a part of what was going on between Meredith and Nick. Now I was sure they both thought I was some freaked out kid that balled her eyes out whenever she saw someone getting their cock sucked. Fuck! I’m so stupid!“Paula, come on inside. It’s ok baby, let’s go inside and sit down.” Meredith said.She wrapped the towel around me and helped me to my feet. I wept harder as we walked into the house. By the time we had passed the kitchen I was.
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