No amount of me trying to explain myself was doing any good. I didn't even know what was going on inside of me, so how could I have explained it to them? But no matter how much evil I see, I think it’s important for everyone to understand that there is much more light than darkness. The return of the voices would end in a migraine that made my whole body throb. I could do nothing except lie in a blacked-out room waiting for the voices to get infected by the pains in my head and clear off. Knowing I was different with my OCD, anorexia and the voices that no one else seemed to hear made me feel isolated, disconnected. I took everything too seriously. I analysed things to death. I turned every word, and the intonation of every word over in my mind trying to decide exactly what it meant, whether there was a subtext or an implied criticism. I tried to recall the expressions on people’s faces, how those expressions changed, what they meant, whether what they said and the look on their. Then she held out her hand, offering to let him join her in the bathroom. Jake looked up, suddenly more hopeful, and reached out to take her hand. Leading him into the bathroom, Béla stepped into the tub.“Ooh! That’s cold!” Béla shivered as she lay down in the empty white tub.Scooting around for a minute, she finally managed to lie down on her back; her legs hiked over the sides and her pelvis jutting up.Taking hold of the sides of the tub with her hands, she looked up at Jake, who was just standing there mesmerized.“Ready?” she asked.Jake nodded nervously and watched as Béla’s stomach muscles tightened. Then a small geyser of yellow liquid sprayed straight up from her tilted pelvis.“Wow!” Jake whispered in awe as he watched this alluring, sexy girl tilt her pelvis almost straight up. Her stream was shooting almost a foot in the air, then splattering back down on her stomach. “Jesus! That’s incredible!”Béla turned her head up toward him, still pissing on herself and said, “You need.
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