Get in, and with your elbow, push 3rd Floor. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell. OK?" Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?..."What ... You're coming empty handed?"Wise Italian GrandfatherAn old Italian man in Brooklyn is dying. He calls his grandson to his bedside, "Guido, I wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome plated... 38 revolver, so you will always remember me." But grandpa, I really don't like guns ... How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?" You lissina me, boy! Somma day you gonna be runna DA business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos." Somma day you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man. "Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, 'Times up!' "?Irish blonde...An attractive blonde from Cork, Ireland, arrived at the casino. She seemed a little intoxicated and bet twenty thousand. More than anything in the world. I love you. At that moment, she jumped into my arms as our lips collided in a fit of passion. Our tongues swirled in each others mouths, as we embraced each other. We had both confessed our love to each other and I have never, ever felt better. The band played Stay The Night by Green Day. We broke, and stared into each others eyes. This was the happiest I had ever been, with her in my arms, staring at each other as we hugged. This was the best moment of my life. I brought her into the house, where the band was 10 times louder than outside. We walked with her arm around my midsection as my arm was around her shoulders. Zach was enjoying himself, moshing in the crowd along with the rest of his friends. He saw me with Char, and he grinned. I motioned for Char to go upstairs, I kissed her and she left, smiling. Of course, Zach saw this, and he was… Surprised, to say the least. Dude, what the fuck was that?! He yelled. Turns out, we love each other! I.
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