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I repeat, what makes you so damn sure!?" "Let's pursue your fascinating conjecture. Suppose I wrote it." "Yeah, OK... I see. Your artistic pretensions have finally gone to your head. Be honest with yourself - you lack the equipment to really appreciate a woman's point of view. No let me re-phrase it. You lack the equipment to appreciate ANY point of view!" Oops! That didn't come out the way I intended it. Andrew had been known to be a touch sensitive to innuendo in the masculinity department. "Other than your own, that is..." I added lamely. But it was too late. He shot up to his feet. "OK, Miss Smarty Pants! Choke on this!" he spat and to my surprise shut his eyes. How to describe what happened next? Perhaps it is best to be honest. I have no way of describing what happened next, but a second later, when he opened his eyes again, locking them against my incredulous stare, those eyes were large, blue and belonged to a male wet-dream of femininity. She would have been a. Then, he presses a button and the pie tin rises, he pushes you on wheels to the oven, opens a hole in crust for your face, then slides you in. Just as he slides you in he changes his mind, Chef has thought of a better way to cook you. Baking little girls always makes them so dry, he thinks to himself. There must be a better way.He decides he will try to boil you instead, but there isn't a pot big enough and that much water would take ages to bring to boil. Instead he will cook you from the inside out. He fetches a long, long roll of butcher's twine from the pantry and begins tying you up. He bends your weak arms behind your back and intricately ties each of your fingers to the corresponding one on the other hand. He takes great care in tying your fingers, when he is done each pair of joints is bound beautifully together. The circulation in your fingers is gone and they form pretty little purple bumps arranged against your upper back.Next he lifts your legs and pulls your feet behind.
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